Observations of a Caring Man

These two blogs are written by a local Tenterfield man whose care and concern calls on us all as a community to support our girls and young women given the forces that surround them in their lives, such as social media and bullying.
​

Technology 

​Technology is fantastic and each generation brings something new to keep making us move forward. The telephone, television, mobile phones and the internet which has Google, Skype and Facebook just to name a few. The internet is great and we have learnt how to use it so easily, but just how easily can you put something on it for everyone to see. 
​

There is so much violence, swearing, bullying and pornography on the internet, but no-one seems to be monitoring what goes on. You have to be a certain age to vote, to get your drivers licence, to drink at the pub, but why can anyone access everything on the internet? How can an eight year old bring up pornography on the internet when searching for information on a school project to do with animals?

I know of a group of boys at different high schools who play a game called Roll Call. Girls names are written down on a piece of paper and then the boys have to try and touch the girls without being noticed or caught...They skype each other and show them playing the game. 

​Why isn’t there a governing body that can block what goes on the internet?

Technology is great and we need to keep moving forward,
but at what cost does it come at sometimes? 

---

bullying

Melissa was a vibrant bubbly teenager in her first year of high school. Tony was in Melissa’s class and as time went on they became girlfriend and boyfriend. ​

Tony had two older brothers he hung around with and they would talk about sex and watch porn. Tony’s perception of a girlfriend wasn’t someone to 

respect but an object for sex. Tony would touch Melissa inappropriately and try and push himself onto her but Melissa would push him away and say, no I don’t want to. Tony would also try and get Melissa to wear skimpy clothes as that’s what he had seen on the internet and in magazines but once again Melissa felt uncomfortable wearing them and refused to.

Melissa couldn’t handle it anymore and broke up with him, which made Tony angry and he started teasing her and spreading rumors. Due to the teasing and rumors, Melissa started to become an introvert, her grades slipped and she didn’t want to go anywhere.
​

Melissa was struggling. Not only was she dealing with a new school environment with new students, teachers and activities, but she was also being teased and bullied.

Eventually Melissa broke down and told her older sister Sophie who had been away on an exchange school program what had been happening. Sophie approached Tony and told him he should have more respect for females and asked him how he would feel if someone was doing this to his sister.

Melissa, Sophie and their parents approached the principal and explained what had been going on and they wanted something done - not to Tony but more about the situation. The principal held a school meeting in the hall and had organised a counsellor to speak on the day to discuss sex, sexual diseases, pregnancy, and about males having respect for females.

Melissa eventually got back to her normal bubbly self with the all the love and help of family, friends and a counsellor.  

* All names have been changed to protect identities.

Photography by Shannon Everest and Iris Pohl